Archive for the ‘comedy’ Category

war on terror

September 13th, 2011

What an interesting linguistic construct. "War on terror" when in fact terror is actually an integral part of war, isn't it? That's the first thing you do, you *threaten* with war. Do this or we'll beat you up. Then, even after you declare war, the adversary still doesn't know at first how serious you're going to be about it. You could send in the whole army right away or just some... pickpockets. Eh? if you think this is bad, just imagine how much worse it could get. Again you threaten, you threaten to escalate. It's all about trying to instill terror. And then once you have war with planes flying over the city, huge explosions, tanks rolling up the street, it's much more terrorizing for the population than "terrorism" itself.

Now imagine this bit performed by:

billbailey_pipe

iphone = sexism

June 24th, 2008

Finger challenged women are complaining about the iphone because their uglyass [fake] long nails prevent them from using the touchscreen comfortably.

Oh man, this is too much. What's next, people who wear their hair down at shoe level will complain that it gets messed up because the street is dirty?

One clever missy has the answer, though.

I wouldn't go as far as to call it misogyny, but it sure is annoying. They should just do what I do, keep one fingernail short for hindrances such as this.

the art of fail

June 10th, 2008

I wrote a guest blog for Rami, which I submitted to reddit. The same exact story was submitted on reddit by someone else, in the same category, mere hours after I did.

new word dialog

June 8th, 2008

Suppose we had a dialog box for adding new words, what would it look like?

The age old tradition of mock dialogs continues...

Ps. Qt Designer on the whole is quite nice to work with, quite a bit better than Glade. Any gui designer is bound to be annoying, but I suppose Qt Designer is approaching the least annoying (and most effective) you can get.

Stabbing incident rocks local community

May 29th, 2008

A local area man was brought up on stabbing charges today, after alarmed neighbors called the police about "sounds of violence" in the adjacent building. Officers arrived on the scene too late to intervene, but found the man in a state of exhaustion, clutching a screwdriver through a glove.

The man did not deny the charges, but upon inquiry, alleged the victim had "evaporated". The police forensic outfit failed to turn up any traces of a struggle.

The case was presumed insoluble until an amateur videotape surfaced, showing the man repeatedly stabbing his refrigerator. The victim is now suspected to have been a large block of ice, alleged to have made "unwelcome advances" toward the man's groceries, according to testimony.

When asked why he didn't simply empty the refrigerator and de-ice, the man stated that course of action could have caused "a diplomatic incident" due to the vast amounts of food products distributed among many owners.

Popular outrage broke out when police officials declined to hold the man. In a press release, the commissioner responded citing "acts of violence committed against elementary particles and their fundamental compounds does not constitute a felony in the greater state of Metropolis". Animal rights groups were soon to renounce the decision, warning that this was setting "a dangerous precedent".

The man was released this afternoon after paying a fine for Indecent Culinary Conduct.