Archive for June 16th, 2005

bad mojo (and fucking gravel)

Thursday, June 16th, 2005

My college class plays soccer on Thursday afternoons. They started about 6 months ago and admirably they keep it up, even now in the summer when school’s out. I went to the first couple of practices just over Christmas and it was fun but I injured myself both times. It was the ankle. So I was healing for a long time, I didn’t go since then. Towards the end of April I was back on the pitch but I didn’t go to the school practice because it was sorta awkward starting at 4pm while I was still at work. Now they’ve moved it to 6pm and today was the first time I played again.

Oh what contrast to the previous practice, 24 degrees and sunny. On top of that I had had a heavy dinner and I felt heavy like a truck, could barely move. But it got better. My form didn’t. I’ve been playing on astroturf and I love it, it’s beautiful. But the school practice is on a gravel pitch and gravel f. sucks. Ball bounces like a maniac and the ball mechanics are all f. up. That means I suddenly have no clue. And no form to chase the ball either, good combination. You may have thought I would be out of place but the other guys are just the same. Ball skills are generally unknown to us. At least on a gravel pitch in my case. So we end up playing these guys who were already there when we showed up, Spanish speaking crew. They’re definitely not Spaniards, they look more American. I can spot a Spaniard because they’re very comsopolitan and dressy, they look totally European. These guys didn’t, they were also very short each and every one. But fun to play with cause they comment every play. Also extremely skilled on the gravel, never a bad touch, fantastic ball reception so you know it wasn’t their first time.

Among our crew we had the leader, the one who always sends out the "meet for practice" emails and keeps the whole thing going, a couple of lanky guys, a real trooper power forward, a determined wingman and young guy in an Ajax shirt who’s whiter than snow. This guy kept pissing me off cause every touch of the ball was a lob, no matter his position on the pitch. All of them very badly taken. So we get underway and we’re clearly inferior. I get a lucky break and score the first goal on a good and lucky finish. Then I try to dribble my man in defence and end up conceding a goal on the next play. My touches are terrible, the ball is all over the place and my reaction time is long cause I don’t move well today. Another lucky finish and I score a second, although I have to give the goalkeeper most of the credit, he totally fumbled it. In all I got 5 shots on goal, at least I forced a save out of the keeper on all but one. It shows I’ve been working on my finishing cause 4 out of those 5 were well taken. And that’s pretty much where my contribution ends. I don’t think anyone outscored me on my team, the wingman also got 2. But that just shows how terrible we were. About 40 minutes into it, I get a good touch for once, the ball is up there, I wanna take it down and turn my man. As I go for it, I get his arm in my face. Nose bleeding. I’m telling you I’m not meant to play with these guys, everytime I show up something happens to me. But I take a breather and I’m good to go again. I get a little better as we go along ball control-wise, but every pass I make is too slow, I can’t make it work at all. I also completely embarass myself on some counters as I fumble the ball most of the times. It’s so disheartening to go from playing well week in and week out the past couple of months on the weekends (astroturf, people) to an absolute stinker today.

But I’m showing up next week.

Oh and one of the guys we played against scored with a bicycle kick, that’s right on gravel.

Paperboys :: No cure for life (2002)

Thursday, June 16th, 2005

It takes a hell of a lot for a rap album to appeal to me. So often it’s one track or two that’s good while the rest is very mediocre. This one is a mixed bag surely but the overall impression is a very decent one. And Norwegian music to boot, it seems to be coming in leaps and bounds.

Having heard only a couple of tracks before I was excited to see what the album would be like. It was released in 2002 so by no means brand new but as I hadn’t heard it before, it was all new to me. The opening track “Introducing” makes a very good impression (which is unusual) and from there it goes slightly downhill but still very worthwhile.

Track rating
Introducing :cool: :cool: :cool: :cool:
Last Lieutnants :cool: :cool:
Barcelona :cool: :cool: :cool: :cool:
Moving Up :cool: :cool:
Put It On :cool: :cool: :cool:
One Of Them Days :cool: :cool: :cool:
In Between :cool: :cool:
Trust Me :cool: :cool:
Ras Steven Skit
Feel It :cool: :cool: :cool:
Boatdrinks :cool: :cool:
It’s Paper :cool: :cool:
No Cure For Life :cool: :cool: :cool: :cool:

7/10

asymmetrical relationships

Thursday, June 16th, 2005

Asymmetrical relationships are defined by a lack of (you guessed it) symmetry in the relation, a lack of balance if you will. To keep it simple, let’s just say that one party is more keen on the relation than the opposite party.

Asymmetrical relationships can be very exciting, to be around someone you’re attracted to (be that in terms of intellect, wisdom, life perspective, physical attraction or any other aspect) is a pretty special feeling. We’ve all been there at some point, most notably as kids in the company of adults. But these relationships lack balance, they’re unstable and they have no long term [stable] future. That means if you want to maintain it, you have to compensate for the unbalance somehow. But the ultimate goal of any relationship which is sought is to make it a balanced one. A balanced one is very comfortable and needs little upkeep. To narrow it down, let’s qualify that we’re discussing close, balanced relationships. Distant relations can be just as balanced but because the level of intimacy is so low, they are much easier to change or break.

So balanced, close relationships is the objective. How to get there? Conventional wisdom (or let’s try recent experience) shows that asymmetrical relations cannot be balanced, at least not easily. It would have to take a very significant shift, one that is unpredictable and presents great risk to the outcome. Aside from that, the relation will break sooner or later, it’s unbalanced and unhealthy. Having played on both sides of the net, I should know to handle it but it seems that certain consequences are inevitable. The feeling of guilt factors on the “victor’s” side while the feeling of being hard done by is present on the “loser’s” side. Inevitably, the victor is less torn up about the break up than the loser is.

So what to do after termination? A logical course of action would be to acknowledge that the relationship was unhealthy and would have to die sooner or later. Still, the force of habit is strong and it takes time to forget and get used to the new situation. I may know that it was inevitable but it’s hard to accept it. I also feel a strong urge to judge but then I keep asking myself do I have the right to judge? What would I have done? I pretty much know the answer and I might have handled it less well than I was treated but the feeling of being wronged doesn’t go away. Another argument is knowing that the bond is cut, there’s no way back (nor should there be) and the only person still thinking about it is me. So why waste time on it if I’m the only one? Seems logical enough but that doesn’t work either. Some things are just hard to forget.

It would be comforting to know that whatever has happened, at least one has learnt how to avoid the pitfalls. But in reality, all one has learnt is that they exist and that one will be equally prone to being trapped the next time around, even knowing that they’re there. Not the best outlook surely?

Ps. This one has been in the pipeline for quite some time but I felt it was time to get it out of my system.